February 11, 2024

S.

Thank you. For allowing me to know you. And for allowing me to share myself with you openly and honestly.

I was not only lucky to have met you, but so lucky to have known you deeply and intimately. Lucky to have shared moments of vulnerability that we will both remember forever.

Your passion and confidence draws my entire self toward you. And when we're together there exists a quiet stillness and beauty which underlies everything you share. You wait for me when you know I need it and reach out when I'm too comfortable staying back. There is so much of you I still want to touch, to understand, to seek out and learn from.

You allowed me the freedom to express myself exactly how I wanted and every moment we had alone together was so comfortable. I looked forward to them every day you were here. Sometimes with a quiet desperation.

Your passion for so many aspects of the natural world reminds me of all the joy available to those who examine the world closely and with an open mind. And this joy is so constantly present in you. It outshines negative events in your past and gives you an energy that inspires, and sometimes overwhelms, those close to you. I often reflected on they ways you looked out for others. How you listened when people needed it and the small things you constantly did to bring moments of joy to those you care about.

I think you say your love language is bullying because mutual teasing is only possible when two people know each other deeply enough to be comfortable in their insecurities. Deep enough to let their idiosyncrasies shine and express the aspects of their personality that make them unique. I look up to you as someone who may not be perfect, but who constantly seeks out truth in ways that strive toward justice and equity.

There are often times when I wonder what else I have to give you. I don't know everything you're looking for, but I hope in our time I was able to give you some of what you felt you needed.

I don't know what comes next in our story. But I know I will yearn for your warmth and compassion often over the next year and will look forward to another quiet afternoon with you sometime, somewhere across the world.

Thank you for giving yourself to me and providing me the opportunity to give myself to you. 

Yours,

Kalvin